


Oz: The Human Diary of a Teenage Werewolf

by ocean_of_notions, radio_silent



Series: The Very Secret Diaries...on the Hellmouth! [2]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Angel Writes A Soap Opera, Crack, Diary/Journal, Humor, Multi, Oz's Family, Season/Series 03, Very Secret Diary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-03
Updated: 2008-03-03
Packaged: 2017-11-09 01:30:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/449757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ocean_of_notions/pseuds/ocean_of_notions, https://archiveofourown.org/users/radio_silent/pseuds/radio_silent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Mom borrowed chains from my closet. Said something about uncontrollable urges. Damn, didn't think she was figuring it out."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oz: The Human Diary of a Teenage Werewolf

Day One  
Missed another vamp last night. That trick only works in movies.

Day Two  
Willow less pleased by my presence at school than had expected. Thought she'd like a slacker boyfriend who sleeps through classes and yet manages to challenge her academically despite all odds. That and potential making out time. Also thought she'd noticed when I didn't go to summer school.

Day Three  
Wolf sense is wacky... I smell a hootenanny. And dead cat.

Day Four  
Found dead cat, suggested we name it Patches. Name choice not approved by group.

Day Five  
Mom borrowed chains from my closet. Said something about uncontrollable urges. Damn, didn't think she was figuring it out.

Day Six  
I might have eaten someone. Faith's standing watch. Hope she doesn't mind nudity with her morning.

Something tells me it won't be an issue.

Day Seven  
Mom ate a ton of that band candy stuff and then asked about my day.

Willow and the others warned that candy was making adults act weird, but I just wasn't prepared for anything like this.

Day Eight  
Living flame v. pretty, v. hypnotic. Almost like moon.

Oh, and getting sucked into hell with a sword through your chest--not as fatal as you might think.

Day Nine  
Willow's gone. Wonder if all that bowling tough talk was a lie... Too bad. I'm pretty good.

Day Ten  
Willow and I seem to be over. Don't know what to say--thought that we had a meaningful, steady relationship. Also didn't think life-threatening situations turned Willow on. That's not why she would offer to wait by my cage, is it? On other note, close to getting that E flat diminished 9th.

Day Eleven  
E flat diminished 9th will have to wait, going over to Willow's later. We seem to be doing a teenage drama thing. It's confusing.

Later...  
Turned down Willow-in-red-dress-with Barry White background music for pajama party, complete with feather boa and the theme from A Summer Place. Guess this means we're back together.

Day Twelve  
Willow almost burnt at stake. Instead I'm supposed to go over her house for dinner next week. Fair trade.

Day Thirteen  
Think I'd prefer being burnt at stake to Willow's mother.

Day Fourteen  
Buffy gets to go to an ice show. Not fair. Ice is cool; it's water, but it's not.

Day Fifteen  
Apocalypse last night. Feel strangely full today.

Day Sixteen  
Uncle Ken bringing Cousin Jordy to visit for the weekend.

Day Seventeen  
Strangest day of my life. Willow turned into not-Willow then back into Willow, just Willow-in-not-Willow-outfit. After having my heart ripped out and stomped on by very existence of not-Willow, found out that not-Willow was Willow from other dimension. And possibly gay.

Mom wondered why Cousin Jordy kept howling last night. Uncle Ken said he's teething. Looks more like fanging to me.

Day Eighteen  
Managed to sneak away from Jordy for a day. This really isn't a two-werewolf town.

Helped Angel set up TV. He must be tired of brooding if he's resorting to daytime soaps.

Day Nineteen  
Faith's evil. Mayor's evil. Angel's evil. Sensing a pattern.

Day Twenty  
Buffy's psychic. Angel's not evil, but lunch lady is.

Day Twenty-One  
Smashed something today. Should try it more often. In other news, Willow's not going to england, and I'm not repeating senior year again.

Day Twenty-Two  
Hell hounds attacking prom. Buffy says we party.

Day Twenty-Three  
Suggested we attack the mayor with hummus. Told Cordelia just trying to keep things in perspective, but the more I think about it, the better it sounds. We'd need to import the chickpeas, though... Sunnydale's not big on the Middle Eastern cusine.

Day Twenty-Four  
Things looking up. Found hummus supplier in LA. Now all we need is a gigantic bucket, some string, and a conveniently placed door...

Later...  
Damn. Buffy perfected her plan first. Now what will I do with 200 lbs hummus?

Day Twenty-Five  
Panicking with Willow so much better than panicking by myself.

Day Twenty-Six  
Willow showed me Angel's manuscript. Pure art. Just can't look at him the same way anymore.

Partly because he's in LA now.  



End file.
